9 to 5 Poet

I’ve called myself a working writer before, but that’s because I work at a full time job and write on the side.  But now, I can call myself a working writer — someone who gets financially rewarded for writing.  I’ve been hired for my very first paying freelance job!  A good friend of mine from college hooked me up with a gig and I get to work at it over the summer.   It’s perfect timing, because my job slows down in the summer (due to the students being done with school), so I’ll have energy to devote to other work.  I am really excited to try something new, and of course, get paid for it.   If it works out, I may try to actively seek out more freelancing later.  Woo-hoo!

SARK, one of my favorite writers in the universe, has a new book coming out this August. I was disappointed with her last book, Fabulous Friendship Festival, mainly because it wasn’t an engaging topic for me.  But her new one is entitled Juicy Pens, Thirsty Paper: Gifting the World with Your Words and Stories, and Creating the Time and Energy to Actually Do It. Now that sounds like a book for me! 

August 5 can’t come fast enough!

If I wasn’t such a dork when it comes to computer stuff, this would have taken much less time.  The blog has a new, pretty WordPress home.  You probably don’t need to update your links or feeds, but WordPress doesn’t use the www. prefix. 

In other random blog related news, my friends and I have started a new movie-reviewing website, Attack of the Movie Watchers, which is also a pretty spiffy WordPress blog.  So basically, I’ve been the domain purchasing queen lately.  (Asphalt Sky is on the docket, after I finishing laying out the issue.)  A stressful experience, but good.  I started this new blog because I wanted a space to review movies, but didn’t want to do it on this literature-related blog, so I made a new one and invited some friends. 

Oh, and speaking of literature and writing a lot, I’ve decided to commit myself to NaPoWriMo.  read. write. poem. is organizing some extra prompt-age in their sidebars and created a pretty button, which you can see below. 

So that’s my life in a nutshell.  How’s yours?

Lately, I haven’t been writing as much poetry as I would like. I understand that this is a temporary situation. Since I’ve been paying closer attention to my writing habits, I’ve noticed that my writing output seems to ebb and flow. There are times when I’m “on” and I write up a storm, 2-3 poems a week. And then there are times when I stumble along, writing little to nothing. I can’t predict when these happen, other than to say that one tends to follow the other.

I’ve learned that I just need to relax into the writing slump, and trust that the writing will return. So, instead of writing, I’ve been doing other things, including reading, writing articles, and volunteering my time. (Besides working my job, naturally.) One of the many books I’m reading now is CrazyBusy by Ned Hallowell. Dr. Hallowell is a leading researcher on Attention Deficit Disorder and this book follows the trend of multitasking and spreading yourself too thin as the new social norm. It’s very enjoyable and easy to read and I find myself in some of his descriptions. Okay, lots of his descriptions.

Here’s one that particularly hit home for me:

“If being busier than I’d like to be is the price I have to pay, most of us seem to say, then so be it. After all, modern life is worth it. Life’s never been this exciting.

But if we’re not careful, we’ll get so busy that we forget to take the time to think and feel. We won’t have the extended periods of time required to complete a thought, develop a conversation, or reflect upon a complex set of emotions.”

This passage reminded me of W.S. Merwin’s quote about poetry that I posted last week. Perhaps, rather than filling my time with other activities when I’m not writing, I should be slowing down. Perhaps my slightly addictive multitasking is drawing energy away from writing.

Hallowell suggests prioritizing as a way to slow down. His argument is that you can only give your energy and attention to so many spheres of your life. After a certain threshold (and everyone’s threshold is different), you become less effective. He says that you should know where your energy is going, rather than rushing around and spending it without thinking.

When I think about my priorities, I know that my energy tends to go to my lower, yet more insistent, priorities while my true priorities get ignored. I’m getting much better at this, but it is challenging to realign my actions with my intentions. If I had to prioritize my life right now, I would say that my top priorities are:

1) Marriage
2) Writing Pursuits (includes poetry, blogging, articles,in that order)
3) Work
4) Friendships
5) Volunteering
6) Other Creative Pursuits (includes reading, photography, and art making, in that order)

I am happy to say that my work is no longer #1 and I don’t behave like it is. (Whew! Hooray for less stressful jobs.) Listing my priorities in this way, I’m not exactly sure what takes up my time. I watch a little too much TV, I spend a lot of time online, not blogging, but Facebook-ing and such. But I’m honestly not sure where it all goes. (Bad sign.) Notice TV isn’t even on there!

This week, I’d like to spend my time closer to how my priorities are listed. While I believe I do a better job than I did a year ago, I certainly think I can do better. I am going to commit myself to a week of slowing down, and realigning my energies. I’m declaring this week, for me, Slow Down Week. I will try to spend my time working on my top priorities, rather than on the “other stuff” that seems to be rushing in.

It’s a funny kind of blessing that my blog birthday is occurring during NaBloPoMo. One year ago today, I began my blog with this post. I started thinking about my blog back then, with this Hemingway quote in mind: “As long as you start, you are all right. The juice will come.” I was feeling uninspired, unremarkable, and generally more 9 to 5 than Poet in my daily life. Rereading this post, I can see how much writing this blog has changed me and my writing practice, and for that I’m grateful.

If it weren’t for this blog and the communities like Writers Island, Poetry Thursday, Fertile Ground, Totally Optional Prompts, and the new read. write. poem., I don’t think I would be writing as much as I am nor feeling as secure in my writing as I do. I also wouldn’t have “met” alot of really amazing writers who are trying to devote time to their own creative practice. I also think I’d probably still be at my last job, feeling miserable and unfulfilled. So writing this blog has definitely been a boon in my life.

Some random stats:
* 267 posts (not including this one, nor including the ones where I link back to places like Technorati)
* 49 labels (not including the above mentioned link back labels)
* “famous writers” and “Inspiration” most populated labels, with 39 posts each
* 3 different templates used (dark dots, rounders, and the current altered minima lefty stretch)
* approximately 89 hours spent navel gazing (assuming 20 minutes per post, without any other navel gazing occuring outside the blog)

Thanks for reading & I hope I can make it through another year! By then, the blog will be potty trained.

I came to writing as a reader. I know this about myself. While other little kids were doing sports and playing outside, I was reading. I loved (and love) being able to immerse myself in language, another person’s perspective, and an invented narrative. Writing, for me, is an extension of reading, a mirroring of what I love.

That being said, there is some business reading I normally don’t enjoy. For instance, I subscribe to Poetry magazine, because it is *the* magazine to be published in. When I went to the Minneapolis Public Library a few months ago, I looked at the archive of Poetry magazine and found that for each year, they truly published the poets that endured in literature. So, I subscribe to it, knowing I am reading the Important Poets.

When I actually get down to reading it, though, I feel like it’s a chore. It’s not the magazine’s fault - I am always pleasantly surprised when I read the issue. I actually enjoy the poetry, most of the time. But it just feels like work — the poems can be too intellectualized or too well crafted or just too tidy. It’s not a poetry I can normally aspire to writing, nor the poetry that I find myself recalling later.

This morning, I had nothing to read while I walked on the treadmill, so I grabbed this month’s issue. (I know there’s a metaphor in there, for what if feels like to read the magazine.) But this issue was really well done. I found myself highlighting almost every poem that appeared, because I liked it so much. Some favorites from this issue:

All of Heather McHugh’s poetry, but these two are good.

The translations of Elfriede Jelinek’s poetry are fabulous, although the translator’s note is a little high-falutin’.

Peter Campion’s “Just Now” and Robin Robertson’s “Cat, Failing,” are both pretty astonishing as well.

I guess the moral of the story (if I need to have one right now) is that I need to return to reading, even the good-for-me, broccoli-type reading, because it all feeds the writing.

This is not a Poet is a Verb entry about something I did today; it is about something I need to do. I need to be able to focus on one task at a time.

I won’t tell the embarrassing story about the things I forgot to do at home this morning, because I was too busy doing them all at once. But I will say, that as I sat on the bus realizing all the things that I forgot to do and worrying about the things I probably forgot to do that I forgot about, I was thinking also about this week’s Writers Island prompt: Unforgettable. I don’t know if I can write about that prompt this week with a straight face.

The irony is that the art I like to do, poetry and photography and my renewed obsession with collage, requires focus. Most poets describe poetry as the act of focusing on details and relaying them with accuracy. At least, that’s the beginning of poetry. Photography literally requires focus, for the selection and the clarity of the image. While I don’t espouse to be a collage expert by any means, my experience on Sunday allowed me to achieve an almost Zen-like meditative focus as I combed through the heaps of materials to find my images. I love that experience when I am writing when I achieve that kind of focus that is both utterly calm and utterly specifically intense. It is then that I know that I am creating something. In fact, it is through these artistic activities that I become what I want to become: someone who recognizes and reacts to the little details.

At work, of course, I can focus on activities. I am the detail-queen. I can recall data and keep my desk and schedule well-organized. But at home, in my everyday life, this focus falls apart. It’s like I can achieve focus in little bursts, when I have to, but when I relax, my brain goes wobbly and I forget where my keys are or how to put on clothes correctly. These are not the things I forgot today, unfortunately…I think.

I don’t know if this is something that I can change about myself. If it is, I can only try to do better. If it isn’t, then I think I’ll need to create a checklist for myself before I leave for work in the morning.

The more I write, the more I understand my inspiration to be cyclical. By that, I mean that there are high times and there are low times. Even looking back at my Weekly Word Counts, I can see that there have been fertile writing times and fallow writing times this year. These times have little rhyme or reason; some days I am inspired, and some days I’m not.

On rare days, I feel a physical itchy rush of energy which translates to getting a lot of work done. This week has been like this. I’ve sat at my computer or in front of my journal for hours and when I’m not writing, I want to be writing. Or reading. Or posting on my blog. I simultaneously love and loathe these high creative times. I love it because I feel productive and on top of the world, and I loathe them because I know the crash that follows.

So this weekend, I’ve been focusing on renewing my energies. Filling the well, as some of my grad teachers called it. Part of this is reading and writing, the two most important verbs that a poet can do, and part of this has been taking care of myself. I can be miserable at this last part — I’d rather do do do than paint my nails or take a walk or meditate, or any of the other typical well filling activities.

However, yesterday, my husband and I went to Minnehaha Falls with the camera and a couple of bottles of water, and we walked. Many of the fall leaves had already fallen to the ground, and that’s when I really realized that November happens this week. (Already.) Sometimes we talked, and other times we were silent, just listening to the rush of the falls and the crunch of the dry brush underfoot.

When we left, I felt both calm and overjoyed, as if I was spilling over inside. I think that’s what serenity and true creativity feels like, not the panicky compulsion to complete more and more tasks.

I am thrilled to announce the opening of submissions for a new online literary journal, Asphalt Sky. Asphalt Sky’s motto:

…Plant Your Feet…

…Arch Your Back…

…Reach Towards the Sky…

Asphalt Sky will publish poetry, prose, and artwork on a biannual basis, perhaps more often, depending on submissions. This journal will be dedicated to the publication of emerging artists and writers who present engaging and thoughtful work.

For more information…

…read Asphalt Sky’s manifesto.

…read Asphalt Sky’s submission guidelines for art, poetry, and prose.

…email me at asphaltsky at gmail dot com.

Why start an online literary journal?

I’m coming up on the year anniversary of this blog and I’ve been astounded by the quality of poetry and prose that I’ve found here amongst my blogging community. I hope to help formally publicize and publish a small fraction of the work that’s inspired and motivated me to work harder.

How can you get involved?

The easiest way would be to submit your work. Submissions are open until December 31, 2007 and I’m looking for a good sturdy issue’s worth of work before I publish.

I would also appreciate it, if you like the manifesto and what I’m trying to do, to tell others about it. I know that while I’ve carved out a little space online for Asphalt Sky, that space only becomes bigger through word of mouth.

Last, if you have a little free time to spare, I am looking for an editorial board. If you’re interested, please email me at asphaltsky at gmail dot com. Later tonight, I’ll post an editorial board announcement on the Asphalt Sky website for more info.

Thanks for taking the time to check it out!

I originally was going to title this post “Finding My Voice.” That wasn’t quite right, though, because I found my voice years ago. However, just because I know where my voice is, doesn’t mean I use it all the time nor in all of the ways it could/should be used.

When I woke up this morning, I read this opinion piece in the New York Times, which talks about young writers at Gustavus Adolphus College in western Minnesota, trying to find their own voices as writers. The author states that there is a certain amount of authority that comes with being a writer. I liked this piece, especially this morning, on a day when I choose to honor my writing practice, because you can read authority for arrogance, truly, because you do have to believe in the importance of your voice in order to be a writer.

If writing is this arrogant act, this belief in the significance in what I say and think, what are the things that I do to honor writing, in spite (or because) of this? Today, I will be honoring my writing in the most simple and obvious ways. I will be actually writing. And doing a lot of it, considering my major procrastination this past week. The biggest way that I can honor my writing practice is by actually writing. Putting pen to paper, fingers to keyboard is the one true way that I honor and engage in my writing.

But once writing becomes a product, it needs to be put out there. Once my voice has been found and used, it needs to be heard. Because, why else would I write, except for other people to read it? The type of work that a writer has to accomplish in order to be heard can be a stark contrast to the act of writing, in some ways. Writing can be solitary and make you vulnerable — publicizing your own writing can seem crass and may open yourself up to criticism. But, I think it’s incredibly important to go that extra step, to further honor the work that I’ve done in creating a piece of writing.

One of the ways I may be helping to publicize my writing is to create business card. The image for today’s post is the card that I designed at the Office Max website. For about 40 bucks, or 30 if it’s all black and white, I can have 1000 calling cards that publicize my writing and help me to connect with other writers. When I went to the book fair this weekend, I realized how incredibly helpful it would have been to have business cards. I was meeting editors and more successful writers, and they had business cards to distribute. So why not me? By the way, I would love opinions on the look of the cards. I’ve blocked out my personal info, for safety reasons. The logo didn’t translate perfectly, so there are actually lines all the way around the word “to”, as if it were encased in a box.

Another way I can be engaging in this practice of using my voice, is to help other writers find and use their own. I’ve been struggling with whether or not to engage in a pretty big new project, and after a lot of thought and traveling to the book fair, I again thought why not me? So today, I will be also working on this project, in between playing with business cards and meeting my deadlines.

As I look at this list of actions that I will be doing today, I realize that writing is a lot of action and a lot of work, more than just sitting at my desk and pounding my thoughts into my computer.